What Catmint Does to You
by symonybaloney
Summary: It all started when they ate the catmint... NOW ITS PURE RANDOMNESS! Latest Chapter: Lionblaze's song and Berrystar
1. How it all started

Once upon a time, Jayfeather had a lot of catmint. He didn't know what to do with it. Finally, he had an idea. He would feed it to every cat who came into his den. So when Firestar somehow resurrected and came into Jayfeather's den, Jayfeather shoved it into Firestar's mouth. Firestar looked at Jayfeather but didn't complain, and then swallowed. Then the catmint kicked in. Firestar ran out of the den, screaming, "DO THE HARLEM SHAKE!"

And thus it began.

Next came Cinderheart, whose belly was swaying, then Lionblaze and Hollyleaf, who mysteriously came back to life. Fallen Leaves followed Hollyleaf. They were mates and Fallen Leaves refused to leave her. So Jayfeather gave all three of them catmint. Their eyes grew then they followed Firestar into the forest.

Lots of cats started coming into Jayfeather's den to have catmint, until Jayfeather was the only one who had not eaten catmint. He shrugged and ate the last bit of it. He went crazy too and started eating all of the herbs until he died, but then he came back to life and ate the rest of them. Then somehow Jayfeather got a pie and he shoved it in Lionblaze's face. Lionblaze started screaming like a little girl.

Then suddenly chocolate rain started falling and Discord randomly appeared. "YOU WILL NAME THE NEXT KIT BORN INTO YOUR CLAN DISCORDKIT!" He screamed like a girl. The cats of ThunderClan said, "Ok." All at the same time. So then Swiftpaw, who was suddenly rainbow colours, came from nowhere and pressed delete on his magical keyboard. Then Discord was deleted. Then somehow Ivypool had a rainbow kit and she named it Discordkit. ThunderClan cheered for Discordkit and Discordkit became Discordstar. "IM LEADER!" Bramblestar screeched but then Discordstar killed him. "DISCORDSTAR! DISCORDSTAR!" ThunderClan cheered.

Then Foxleap became Foxcatcher at his request. But he hadn't caught a fox, so he had to be Rabbitcatcher until her found a fox and caught it. So Rabbitcatcher caught a fox and became Foxcatcher. Discordstar decided that Berrynose didn't suit Berrynose so he renamed him and now his name was Berrystumpytail. Berrystumpytail cried like a girl until Poppyfrost screeched and music played. Ferncloud came back and Dustpelt fainted. Then Spottedleaf and Sandstorm attacked each other, while Firestar started singing gangnam style. ShadowClan brought catmint and joined the party.

Then DJ Birchfall started playing gangnam style. Firestar was PSY, Sandstorm was the hot girl, and Ferncloud and Spottedleaf were the backup dancers. Spottedleaf danced with Tigerstar who was her new mate and Ferncloud danced with Dustpelt. They all danced the gangnam style dance. "OP, OP OP OP. OPPA GANGNAM STYLE." Firestar barked, and then Firestar pointed at Sandstorm and woofed, "EHHHHHH SEXY LADY." Sandstorm started flying. Then the elevator part came and Graystripe and Firestar did that part. And that continued all night.

Then in the morning Ferncloud had twenty kits. The allegiances of the kits are below:

PSYkit- Tuxedo tom with green eyes. Born with sunglasses and sings gangnam style a lot.

P!inkkit- A hot pink kit with rainbow eyes and signs 'Sober' by P!nk a lot. She has rainbow eyes.

Katyperrykit: A purple kit who like Katy Perry a lot.

Awesomekit: A rainbow kit that changes colours. She is freking awesome.

Wierdkit: A strange yellow kit with blue eyes. He likes to eat.

Wafflekit: A waffle-coloured she-kit who discovered waffles. AND SHE LOVES THEM.

Pancakekit: A pancake-coloured kit who loves pancakes and discovered them. He is in love with Wafflekit, even though she's his sister.

Poppykit: Tortishell tom.

Suddenly Berrystumpytail stopped Ferncloud from listing her kits. He said that Poppykit had a normal name so Ferncloud changed it to Rainbowkit.

Pegacornkit: A blue she-kit with a horn on her head and with pegasus wings.

Piekit- Pale brown tom that shoots pie out of his mouth.

And there was more, but they weren't important. Awesomekit walked up to Discordstar and screamed, "MAKE EVERY CLAN EAT CATMINT!" So Discordstar poofed up some catmint and brought it to the other clans. The other clans started coming to ThunderClan. Pegacornkit flew into the air, made a magical rainbow shoot from her horn, and then spun in circles.

The rest of the day was too crazy to describe, but things such and flying, pie throwing, and signing occurred.


	2. One Direction and Goldenninja

The next day, Discordstar called a meeting. "Clans of teh forest!" Yes, he said teh. "I have invited One Direction to the forest!" After his announcement, a giant stage appeared and One Direction magically flew down.

"You don't know you're beautiful!" Harry screeched. Several cats covered their ears. Then Niall started singing, and the angels sang, too. Every she-cat fainted and some even ran onto stage and tried to steal him. Niall gasped in shock as cats fought over him.

Suddenly, SparklingLemonadekit flew down magicaly and shoo-da-whooped every other cat. "He's mine. Ok?" SparklingLemonadekit had a hint of warning in her mewl. The other cats nodded, and then Niall started singing Little Things to her.

Then one thing came on, and Discokit (one of Ferncloud's not important kit's) became important and became a cat disco ball. He magically floated into the air and started spinning. One direction sang, cats fainted, and cats partied.

When One Direction was preparing to leave, cats started screeching in protest. Niall kissed SparklingLemonadekit and then he poofed away along with the others. Every cat cried and squealed in protest.

Suddenly, a unicorn with a waffle for a face came out of a cloud with a golden she-cat on it. She wore ninja clothes and carried nun-chucks in her mouth. She leaped off the unicorn, did a 360 backflip, and then landed gracefully on the ground. "ZOMG SHE'S HAWT!" The toms squealed.

Discordstar fainted, Dustpelt started screaming, and PSYkit was so amazed he proposed to her. Of course, she said no, so PSYkit went to a corner and cried.

"I am Goldenninja!" The new she-cat announced. Discordstar un-fainted and bowed down to her. "Every town bow down! NOW!" So every tom listened to Discordstar and bowed down, except for PSYkit, who was still sobbing. But Discordstar excused him just this once.

Wafflekit raced up to the unicorn and ate its face. The unicorn neighed and started dancing randomly. So Wafflekit stole the unicorn from Goldenninja. Goldenninja didn't care because she was too busy dealing with the toms that were coming at her like a wave. So Wafflekit rode the unicorn into the distance.

By the time the toms stopped coming at Goldenninja, three days had passed. Wafflekit had came back without the unicorn. Apperantly, she had ate it. Goldenninja had made it quite clear that she didn't want a mate, but still several cats were sobbing. Pancakekit suddenly ate Wafflekit but then somehow she ate him. Then both magically came back.

Strange.

* * *

**If you want your cat to be in this give me some info about your cat in a review!**


	3. Lionblaze's song and Berrystar

Piekit padded up to a huge tree that had just magically grown. "Hi tree!" Piekit meowed. The tree didn't respond, so Piekit shot pie at it until it fell onto a patrol of cats.

Next Piekit padded up to a river. "Hi river!" Piekit meowed. The river didn't reply, so Piekit shot pie at the river until the pie soaked up the water.

"Hi Lionblaze!" Piekit meowed. Lionblaze looked at him. "I like big butts and I cannot lie!" Piekit gasped in fright and shot pie at him. "My butt isn't big!" Piekit hissed, offended.

Piekit now did not know what to do. "Wafflekit, come here so I can eat you." He meowed. Wafflekit padded up and when Piekit shot pie at her she just ate them. "Yum, raspberry." Wafflekit meowed as she trotted away to go see if her unicorn had grown its face back.

Meanwhile, Bramblestar had come back to life. He was trying on different dresses in his secret wardrobe in his den. Lionblaze was also there to try on dresses. "What do you think about this one Lionblaze? Does it make my butt look big?" Bramblestar asked, twirling in a pretty, girly pink dress. Lionblaze's favourite song started playing in his head. "I like big butts and I cannot lie!" He screeched so that all the other clans heard. Bramblestar ran off crying.

Lionblaze padded up to Goldenninja. She was shooting ninja stars at a tree. She was doing awesome flips and dodging the ones that bounced back. "Come at me bro!" She hissed. One of the ninja stars hit Lionblaze. Lionblaze cried.

Berrystumpytail strapped a twig to his tail. "CHANGE MY NAME BACK RIGHT NOW!" He hissed at Discordstar. Discordstar nodded. "No. Now you're called Berrytwigtail." Berrytwigtail nodded his aprovement.

Poppyfrost hit him with a celery stalk. "Go brush my fur!" She hissed. Berrytwigtail nodded and slunk away. He got a comb and brushed her fur. "I think I want to be a leader." He meowed and padded towards Discordstar's den. "Discordstar, I wanna be the leader!" He whined. "Ok." Discordstar meowed.

Thus, Berrytwigtail went to the Moonpool, got 3001 lives, and became Berrystar. He looked at Discordstar and then Bramblestar. "Lets go get Taco Bell. I'm hungry." So they went and got Taco Bell. Berrystar licked his fingers when he was done. "That was yummy." He meowed.

Ferncloud had another kit and named her Frenchkit. "Bonjour, comma ca va?" She meowed. The others didn't know what to say, so Lionblaze just meowed, "Je suis AWESOME!" Frenchkit hissed and swatted at him with peanut butter. Unfortunately, Lionblaze was allergic to peanut butter, so he stayed in a hospital for a week.

"THIS. IS. SPARTAAAAA.!" Frenchkit hissed when Lionblaze got back. They started fighting. Dovewing(who really likes Glee) started singing the glee version of defying gravity. She leaped off a cliff and magically floated around. "I THINK I'LL TRY DEFYING GRAVITY!" She yowled.

Berrystar tried defying gravity and failed, and he lost 100 lives. He cried like a girl until Poppyfrost came and hit him with a celery stalk once again, and she used her power of nagging until Berrystar cleaned up.

And then Spongbob came from under the sea and started singing. Lionblaze sang with him forever.

Just kidding.

After a week they stopped singing because Lionblaze started singing 'Big Butts" again. And Wafflekit also ate her unicorns face.


End file.
